Both individually and collectively, we are facing a moment of great disillusionment. We are losing faith in our institutions. Many of us feel more angst about our futures and the very future of our planet. The easy paths are either to 1) ignore the chaos we see around us, 2) to let the pain of disenchantment feed our anger and fear or 3) fall into a pit of despair at the state of things.
Our anxiety at the state of things might be the thing we need to wake up. Rather than regarding this collective crisis as one big mistake, we might also consider it the perfect curriculum required for each of us to grow and evolve into the human beings we need to be. As the spiritual teacher and author, A.H. Almaas, writes:
The problematic situations in your life are not chance or haphazard. They are specifically yours, designed specifically for you by a part of you that…doesn’t want you to lose the chance. It will go to extreme measures to wake you up, and it will make you suffer greatly if you don't listen. What else can it do? This is its purpose. (1)
Everything we touch and see, including the things that cause our suffering, has within it the potential to wake us up. Developing emotional strength requires then that we be willing to let go of what we think should or shouldn’t happen, what’s right or wrong, what’s good or bad. Instead, we bring a quality of openness, receptivity, even a welcoming to whatever it is that we experience, even if it is initially unpleasant.
Instead of resisting or ignoring this unpleasantness, we want to learn to turn toward it, to face it. Welcoming unpleasant feelings is both counterintuitive and daunting, especially if we have spent a lifetime turning away. Most of us develop a guarding around our hearts to protect us from pain or discomfort. We have become addicition to distractions of various forms, like compulsively checking social media, ingesting intoxicants or binge-watching the latest series on Netflix.
If we can let our hearts feel again, we might initially confront overwhelming pain, but if we can learn to stay centered and non-reactive, the initial discomfort will eventually abate. If we can learn to ride our emotions all the way to shore, we begin to discover an inextinguishable strength within ourselves. In mindfulness, this strength is called boddhichitta. “Chitta” is heart-mind. “Bodhi” is the same root as “buddha.” It means awakened, enlightened or completely open. Our bodhichitta is a completely open heart and mind. As Pema Chodron puts it:
Bodhichitta is our heart—our wounded, softened heart. Right down there in the thick of things, we discover the love that will not die. This love is bodhichitta. It is gentle and warm; it is clear and sharp; it is open and spacious. The awakened heart of bodhichitta is the basic goodness of all beings. (2)
Few of us access this fountain of strength on our own. We need support and guidance. Many of us mistakenly believe that asking for help is a sign of weakness. It is, instead, a sign that the stakes have just gotten higher, and the current set of tools we have aren’t quite up to snuff.
The good news is that there are trustworthy people out there to help teach us how to find our unique way forward. They come in the form of guides, teachers, therapists, coaches, doctors, healers, books, teachings, practices, philosophies, medicines etc. For many of us, the plethora of choices can be overwhelming.
The critical thing to look for is any non-dogmatic teaching. It would help if you were allowed to experiment with what you learn rather than taking it on faith. It would be best if you didn’t have to follow tradition for tradition’s sake but through your own experimentation. If you discover that the practices and teachings both make sense and work for you, you’ve found your path to developing inner strength.
Footnotes
(1) Almaas, A.H. Diamond Heart Book One: Elements of the Real Man. Shamabala Boulder. 2000.
(2) Chodron, Pema. Comfortable with Uncertainty: 108 Teachings on Cultivating Fearlessness and Compassion. Boston, MA. Shambhala. Kindle Edition. 2008.