The picture above is of my most favorite aunt, Jeannde. She was one of those very special souls who embraced life with joy, openness, and wonder no matter the circumstances. In the photo, you can see that she’s got whipped cream smeared on her face. She was playful all the way to the end. She had a way of bringing light and laughter wherever she went.
Melissa, my wife, and I got to say goodbye to her a few days before her passing. The evening when we walked into her room, I could feel a profound peace, beauty, and light. At the time, she was in limbo, not quite in this life but not quite in another. She wasn't scared but, in fact, at peace. She was clearly in a lot of bodily discomfort, but her spirit was palpably in total acceptance. We managed to exchange a few powerful words, letting each other know how much we meant to one another; saying, "I love you"; and then, eventually, saying, "Goodbye."
I left that night with a deep peace that reverberated in my heart for weeks afterward. Jeannde showed me that it is possible to continue to stay curious, not only in the twilight years but even up to the moment of death. I always like to tell others that at the ripe age of 87, she was coming to my yoga classes, bending, twisting, and breathing, just like every other 20-something student in the room. I once told her that a few of my students were inspired by her presence in the room. She couldn't understand why. Age meant nothing to her except for the fact that her body was quite a bit less responsive than it had been in her younger years as a dancer.
Jeande taught me that circumstances don't make the light dim within us. At each threshold, no matter what we face, we have a choice, to stay open or close. On her deathbed, on the threshold of the great unknown, in agonizing physical discomfort, she was sharing her heart, expressing her love, and accepting the calling that it was time for her to go. Not only did the circumstances she was in not dim her. They only seemed to add to her luminescence and awe-inspiring capacity to stay in curious and open.